


I Will Always Find You

by NotInPublic



Category: The Last Kingdom (TV), The Warrior Chronicles | The Saxon Stories - Bernard Cornwell
Genre: I Will Go Down With This Ship, M/M, One Shot, Season/Series 04 Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-03
Updated: 2020-05-03
Packaged: 2021-03-01 17:14:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 717
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23980645
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NotInPublic/pseuds/NotInPublic
Summary: Finan is scared of the sickness that surrounds them and Sihtric comforts him.Warning: slight series 4 spoilers.
Relationships: Finan/Sihtric (The Last Kingdom)
Comments: 10
Kudos: 90





	I Will Always Find You

"Calm down. Breathe."

It was the quiet but firm tone of Sihtric's voice that brought Finan back from the throughts in his head. The thoughts that swam with images of death and suffering and the smell of fear. 

Finan latched on to that calm command, felt cool air enter his lungs and his muscles begin to unclench.

He must be bad this time. Sihtric usually only reserved that tone for horses that were threatening to bolt with fear. Was that how he looked? How he felt?

Finan's fear dazed eyes met Sihtric's own, feeling his heart rate slow at the steady reassurance there. 

As though he thought Finan might truly bolt at any second, Sihtric's movements were slow and deliberate. His hands cupped Finan's face and his forehead moved to rest against his own. Their eyes never broke contact.

"Sihtric" Finan's voice broke as the panic threatened to engulf him again. He tried to look away, ashamed of the state he was in, trying to pull away from the other man's knowing gaze.

"No" Sihtric commanded, again using that quiet assertive tone, laced with a steel that rooted Finan to the spot.

Sihtric's hands worked softly at Finan's own, unlacing his fingers from the cross that had driven deep, red grooves into the skin. As he felt the metal fall from his grasp, Finan realised his hands were shaking. Not just his hands but his whole body. Gooseflesh covered his skin, despite the glorious sun beating down on them.

Breathing in a jagged gasp, his surroundings began to bleed into focus. He heard birdsong in the distance, could smell smoke from the campfire that must have been lit while he had been drowning in his memories of pain and suffering, of sickness.

"You don't understand" he croaked "none of you do." 

"Shh" Sihtric soothed, not letting Finan slip away from him again. Forcing him to stay in the present.

Next Sihtric worked at the fastenings keeping Finan's weapons strapped to his body. As their weight fell away, Finan's chest felt lighter and breathing came slightly easier. Still Sihtric's eyes had not moved from his own.

When all that was left was his light tunic, Sihtric finally closed the gap between them. Eyes interlocked with Finan's until his lips could take over, his movements steady and deliberate.

In contrast, Finan moved with the despiration of a drowning man. No longer rooted to the spot with fear, he clung to Sihtric as though his life depended on it. His fingers wound through Sihtric's dark hair, anchoring himself to this place of security.

Sihtric took the change of pace in his stride. They had done this enough times over the years to fall into an easy rhythm. Letting Finan take the lead, his movements became faster but no less measured. All of his attention was focused on the man in front of him. Beneath him. On top of him.

***

Afterwards, when they lay entwined in the long grass, the sun bathing their skin in warm light, Sihtric's body finally relaxed. The anxious tension that he'd been battling since Finan's first outburst had eased and a soft smile played on his lips. 

The unfazed, reassuring exterior that had calmed Finan earlier had been mask, of course. Seeing Finan so frightened- Finan, who would pick a fight with ten men without so much as a second thought. It had been enough to terrify Sihtric. 

"Was it really so bad?" He half-whispered, playing with the chord that secured the cross around Finan's neck.

Looking down at the man resting on his shoulder, he nodded briefly "Aye. It was bad."

As each of them lay quietly with their thoughts, it was a while before either spoke again.

"Thank you" Finnan finally broke the easy silence and Sihtric raised confused eyes in response. "For finding me. For bringing me back. I've fought back those memories for so long, I thought they might engulf me".

Rolling on his side to curl into Finnan, Sihtric ran a finger along a scar marking the older man's abdomen. 

"I will always find you." He repeated the vow they'd made to eachother so many times over the years.

As a chill entered the air, compelling them to return to camp and the others, they both knew it to be true.


End file.
